Hanging Out

“Will not have many girl friends and will not do ‘girly’ things like shopping with them or having get-togethers to ‘hang out.’” This trait is hard for me to measure myself against. Why? Because I love aesthetics in art and music… I love dress-up for cosplay and dark styles… I enjoy buying new clothes… I […]

Stimming

“Stims to soothe when sad or agitated: rocking, face-rubbing, humming, finger-flicking, leg-bouncing, finger or foot- tapping, etc.” Sometimes you might catch me like this. I might look impatient or rude. Really, I’m probably overstimulated or overloaded and doing my best to keep it together. My stressed stims are rocking, tapping, squeezing for pressure, leg flapping, […]

Misunderstood

“Words and actions are often misunderstood by others.” My genuine compliments sometimes sound like insults. My acts of kindness can come across as condescending. My “no” gets taken for “maybe” or even “yes.” I don’t always know the right sayings, the appropriate phrases, or the key words to be understood, and the results are often […]

Authenticity

“Like her male counterpart, may shut down in social situations once overloaded, but is generally better at socializing in small doses. May even give the appearance of skilled, but it is a ‘performance.’” I wear a mask so well, I forget who I am. I can make my interests your interests for a whole conversation. […]

Love to Learn

“Highly intelligent, yet sometimes can be slow to comprehend due to sensory and cognitive processing issues.” Through structured settings, through books, through close-captioned instructional videos, I can learn almost anything and learn it quickly! But if my mind is overloaded, if fluorescent lights are buzzing, if an instructor off-topic improvises or forgets to check for […]

Sense of Self

“May not have a strong sense of identity and can be very chameleon-like, especially before diagnosis.” I used to pride myself on this trait. I could be anybody and pretend (sometimes until I believed the lie) that I liked anything a friend liked. I told myself that it was good that I could fit in […]